Saturday, July 27, 2013

In one second a choice is made to give your baby a chance at a better life.This choice will forever change you and your baby's life forever.They tell you how great you are for giving the gift of life to a couple who cant have kids.They suck you in by working on your desire to help a couple in need.They let you pick a couple of your choosing telling you the couple will do what you have written in the paperwork.{they fell to tell you the paperwork is fake and the couple don't have to follow through with anything you want for your baby.They have to meet you needs and tell you everything you want to hear cause that's the only way they make money off your sweet baby.They don't understand the bond a mother and baby share and the loss and pain it causes for mother and baby.The baby never forgets the loss and pain and spend many years looking for the answers.The mother suffers from the loss as deeply as the baby.There is great joy carrying a life in you that moves and kicks and responds to your every word love so pure even before birth.The joy you feel at giving birth to your child will be replaced with crying,guilt,shame and loss as you see your baby leave you and go home with strangers.Then deep anger because of the lies the company tells you.They tell you you can have an open adoption if you so choose.giving you false hope of seeing your baby.Only to find out the whole thing is a lie.There is no such thing as an open adoption the papers you sign are not enforceable in the court of law.The couple has full control and power over you and your baby.You loss all rights to your baby once that paper is signed.Your a stranger to the baby who once depended on you.The couple can change birth records and hide facts about the birth,so it looks like they gave birth to your baby.The feelings you feel after the lies are told and the adoption is final is helplessness,if i had a better standing in life and had a great job i could of kept the baby.Guilt,what kind of loving mother would give her baby to strangers.Deep loss in your heart, your always looking and hoping for your baby to come back.Hoping the couple will let you have some small part in their life.Rage,I hated the couple for what they did and the lies they told.I wanted them to hurt as deeply as they hurt us.Anger at the person who helped you make the choice of adoption.Deep Sadness you cry for no reason and you feel a deep stabbing feeling in your heart that never seems to go away.Withdrawn you don't seem to want to be around your family or friends and if you have kids it hard to deal with them knowing what you had to do to their brother or sister.Healing dose come its facing the fact that your baby is not coming home and faith-asking god to heal the loss and pain and help you to move on.You never forget your baby you just carry them in your heart.

I been there,went through the pain,loss, and tears and want to offer support if your faced with the same choice.This changes you and your baby life forever. email me anytime stoldt8@yahoo.com